Monday, April 6, 2009
{ 10:51 PM }
How far would you go to escape? Hide yourself in your room and hope things will be okay? Ignore it totally? Go to another country?
I escaped once by coming here. I thought I could totally rebuild my life and find myself back again. In a way it did work, I got out of something that was making me lose my identity and mind. It wasn't all that bad but I guess things could have been better.
I did pretty much start to gain back things I've lost, my confidence, my laughter and it did pretty much slip through my fingers again.
Summer break was a good break I guess, being around friends, changing of style, hair colour, makeup. It was certainly a good boost for my insecurity and I nearly didn't want to come back.
Things hasn't been smooth sailing this year I must say. I'm just hoping it'll turn for the better soon. Some things happened as well, and much as I'd like to leave it all behind I know it's quite hard since everything here reminds me of things. Still I'm glad to find friends who'll love me no matter what.
My next escape would probably to US, some things just need to be gotten rid from my mind for good and nothing else works better than a new environment and the thrill of something different. I know escaping is the worst way to solve things, but sometimes I just don't have the courage to face the problem face on or some times a change of scenery is the best. Some times some things just cant be solved.
So I guess my way of escaping is just travelling to another country. It might cause me to make the same mistakes. I might just run out of countries to escape to some day. But for now, wish me luck whilst I aim to travel around the world =p
